WALKING WITH JESUS MINISTRIES

7 Bull Street, Ahuriri, Napier, New Zealand
www.wwj.org.nz
 

'GROWING BELIEVERS INTO DISCIPLES, UNITED IN CHRIST, REFLECTING JESUS TO THE WORLD'

 
ANOTHER LIST OF CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS!!

Rarely does anyone ever create the Sunday bulletin and then run it by the pastor or a few sanctified editors for things like punctuation, clarity, etc'but maybe we should. Why do I say that, you ask? Well, read the following list of actual church bulletin bloopers and you'll understand why.

These are funny, embarrassing, hilarious, and'oh, just read them yourself. Enjoy, and share them with someone at your church who needs a good laugh!

1. Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

2. Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

3. The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.

4. On a church bulletin during the minister's illness: GOD IS GOOD; Dr. Hargreaves is better.

5. Applications are now being accepted for 2 year-old nursery workers.

6. The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, 'Break Forth Into Joy.'

7. If you would like to make a donation, fill out a form, enclose a check, and drip in the collection basket.

8. Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on 'It's a Terrible Experience.'

9. Don't miss this Saturday's exhibit by Christian Martian Arts.

10. We are grateful for the help of those who cleaned up the grounds around the church building and the rector.

11. A worm welcome to all who have come today.

12. Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Nelson's sermons.

13. During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.

14. Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

15. The ushers will come forward and take our ties and offerings.

16. The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Reverend and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

17. The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

18. Don't let worry kill you off ' let the church help.

19. Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person(s) you want remembered.

20. Let us join David and Lisa in the celebration of their wedding and bring their happiness to a conclusion.

 
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Check out the WWJ website for….
More Jokes: www.wwj.org.nz/laugh.php
If Only I'd Thought of it: http://www.wwj.org.nz/thought.php
Laughing at Ourselves: http://www.wwj.org.nz/laugh.php
A look at some of lifes curious questions: http://www.wwj.org.nz/why.php
Everything you ever wanted to know about....: http://www.wwj.org.nz/exex.php

 
© Walking With Jesus Ministries Charitable Trust: As this material is freely received, use is freely given, indeed encouraged, for non-commercial purposes. Acknowledgement of the source is always appreciated.